When Tire Tracks Feel Like Bears: Reclaiming Calm and Connection

I saw a meme recently:

“Unfortunately, my nervous system can’t tell the difference between being chased by a bear and aligning my tires in the tracks at the car wash.”

I immediately laughed out loud, by myself on the couch, because lately, that confusion has been all too real for me. 

Our nervous systems are meant to metabolize stress similar to how our bodies metabolize food. We eat food, metabolize it, and release what we don’t need. Our stress system is meant for activation, metabolization, and release. Often the ‘release’ part is forgotten. We say things like “I’ll have time to have fun on Friday with my friends,” or “the kids will be gone on Saturday and I’ll have a nice, relaxing night at home.” While these ideas are great and can be rewarding, it is the small moments that can have the biggest impact on our stress metabolization and release process.  

If you feel your system is confusing the bear with a dropped bowl of cheerios, or you want to try to prevent that confusion from happening, try some small moments of metabolization and release.

For me, that looks like pausing at my desk and taking one of those deep, slow, cleansing “breathe from your feet” kind of breaths where I can hear my own slow inhale and exhale. For days when I need a little extra help, I attune to the natural rhythm of my breath, and picture it coming and going like the waves of the ocean; or I look outside to notice the ease with which the tree sways and leaves dance with the wind. Sometimes as I’m walking up the steps to greet my next client, I remember the crunch of the leaves under my feet and the fresh smell of rain in the mountain air from our last family adventure. 

Over time, I’ve been able to use those extra 2 minutes to embrace the silence in my car and calm the prickly tornado in my stomach before I connect with my family again. Sometimes I’m that awkward hugger with my husband or kids… the one that wants to hold on just a smidge too long because connection is how I heal; it is how I unplug the electricity under my skin. I know the pebbles of activation are released/properly metabolized when I feel the “shift” inside; you’ll know it when you feel it.  

What I also know to be true: these small moments are even more impactful since I’ve done the work with my own therapist (and continue to get ‘tune ups’ as needed) to metabolize leftover boulders in my system from overwhelming life experiences. My invitation to you is to play with the next 30 second break you have. How will you create the small shifts your nervous system desperately needs throughout the day? If that poses a significant struggle, you may want to consider professional help metabolizing any boulders of your life experiences.

Either way, you’re worth the investment.